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The Blogfather Chronicles
The Blogfather Chronicles

Britton Colquitt: The Good, The Bad, And The Uglyl!

Wait a minute - shouldn't that be the good, the bad and the Knoxville News Sentinel?  Seriously though, who needs enemies when you have a bunch of buffoons like John Adams, Mike Griffith and Opie Taylor (oops, I mean Dave Hooker) shoveling dirt on anyone who isn’t home and in bed by 8 PM?  I mean gees, you’d expect athletes like Britton Colquitt and Candace Parker to occasionally get the prints from another athletes shoe imbedded onto their skin somewhere, but you’d never expect to see prints from those manly size 7 ½ Hush Puppies that Adams and Griffith wears.  Or worse - size 6 prints from those Incredible Hulk Tredz Dave Hooker wears.

Let’s be serious for a moment. Here we have an obvious crisis within a family. Never mind that the family is a relatively high-profile family -- they have a serious problem to deal with. When a young man in his early twenties has been arrested twice for DUI and has been in trouble numerous other times for alcohol related problems, it’s evident that he has an alcohol problem. And no disrespect to the 99.1 Sports Animal morning crew, but yeah, more times than not a person like Britton is already an alcoholic, or they are well on their way to becoming one. For each time a person is caught, it is estimated that he or she has committed that same offense dozens of other times without being caught. This guy (Britton) has a problem much bigger than football and even bigger than the DUI itself - it’s called Alcohol! I’ll even go a step further and say that I think he and his family should treat his situation as though he is a highly addicted alcoholic.

Back to the News Sentinel Sports page on 99.1 The Animal:

Listening to these jokers just solidifies the reasons why I stopped reading their columns more than six years ago. No one gives a shit about a gay opinionated newspaper columnist, much less three gay opinionated newspaper columnists. Besides, people want the news, the facts surrounding the news, and specific details from an objective point of view. Opinions are everywhere for free - including here.

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To The Sports Animal Knoxville: Mediocrity Over Talent?

After leaving Knoxville and having listened to 104.5 the Zone in Nashville for 4 years, I have come to a conclusion:  There is NO comparison in talent. 104.5 the Zone makes 99.1 the Sports Animal look more like animal crackers and juice. 

I know it must be tough finding quality radio talent, but after Doc, Jeff and Heather signs off each day, I’d rather listen to classical music as to have to listen to Dave Hooker, Mike Griffith and the rest of their untalented little posse.  It’s the worst two hours in radio anywhere!  In fact, no matter where I’m at, someone always changes the dial when the morning show ends.

For starters, neither Dave nor Mike has one ounce of radio talent, and why they are allowed to talk senselessly each morning is beyond me.  Example: On Monday February 11th 2008, I listened as two buffoons (one unknown) totally butchered a NASCAR segment.  All of the useless blabbing, misinformation, and total lack of knowledge about not only the sport, but about Dale Jr, Hendrick Motorsports, as well as other drivers, was a dagger in the credibility and heart of all of Knoxville and Tennesse related sports.  Shit, they couldn’t even properly pronounce the names of many of the drivers.  How weak is that?

As good as UT Volunteer sports has been over the years, having these unknowledgeable and unqualified jokers on the radio representing us as a sports voice is a total embarrassment to not only the UT Volunteers, but to the fans and all sports teams throughout the entire State of Tennessee.

I urge and even beg the Sports Animal in Knoxville to find some quality replacements for the aforementioned people.  Not only does the community deserve better, but I feel that the future of 99.1 The Animal most certainly depends on it. 

Oh yeah.  As for Candace Parker - the difference between her and Holdsclaw is 3 or 4 more positions on the basketball court, not to mention the dunk.  Holdsclaw was great but Parker is better.   Now scat boys, don’t you have some junior college gymnastics to cover?

P.S.  This is not an indictment against the talent of the morning show, past and present athletes, Jimmy Hyams or the Jim Rome show.  Just the little groupies who couldn't make it in radio or TV and fill space at the worst time of the day. 

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C. Vivian Stringer - See Vivian Stringer Lose!

Let’s put the lady scarlet hard-luck heroes to bed already. Seriously though, I am sick and tired of it all. From the Imus situation, all the way up to last night when the women Rutgers team LOST - aka GOT BEAT etc, etc. You get the picture - right? Drop it!

For one, Imus was 100% correct. I mean gees, you all run around calling each other bitch, hoe, and the “N-word,” yet freak out and do everything in your power to detract attention away from the real NCAA Women’s Basketball Champions the Tennessee Lady Vols, just to play the role of victim.

Now C. Vivian Stringer is playing the victim role again, even allowing people to question the integrity of Pat Summit and suggesting that somehow that UT officials had something to do with the time-clock in their LOSS on Monday, February 11, 2008.

Listen, Pat Summit has more class and integrity in her little finger than the entire Rutgers coaching staff and UCONN coaching staff put together. This lady has done it all, and some might even say she has made it possible for the likes of Stringer and Auriemma to do what they are doing today. Besides, Pat Summit has NEVER been nearly as concerned with regular season losses as she has been with tournament time game-play.

So please, go the hell away and quit trying to play hard-luck victim, and quit stealing the spotlight from real Champions.

Oh and one last piece of advice: Don’t anyone EVER let C. Vivian Stringer and Greg Schiano have kids together. Can you imagine the ugliness? God help us all!
                                                                           
My Name IS Forest

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Woo Hoo Staci Loo - Revisited!

Wow, I can't say enough about this fine beauty - Staci Loo.  She is pictured in another post below and she's also one of my very nice myspace friends.  I thought about waiting a few days to update my site, but with a picture like this it warranted immediate attention. So here you have it, one of my favorite pictures EVER!

You know the gig, click it and go vote for Staci in the VG promo, then come back and look some more.

Staci Loo

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Serena Williams Or She-Man Williams? Is This Chick On Steroids?

Well, what do you think? I know that many of you know little, if anything about anabolic steroids and performance enhancing drugs, however, I do - but first this: For me, my suspicions grew immensely in 2004 after this famous statement was made:

 ATHENS, Greece -- Just a few hours before she was supposed to board the U.S. Olympic tennis team's flight to Athens, Serena Williams sent word via e-mail that she wouldn't be going to the Summer Games because of a bad left knee.

"I've never been this disappointed in my career," Williams told The Associated Press by telephone from Florida on Wednesday night. "The good news is I don't need surgery.”
~Serena Williams~

Okay, at this point I was convinced. For a few years I watched Serena just to simply be baffled at this freak of nature. Forget He-Man, Serena looked more like a manly Super Hero than a feminine tennis player. And while I’m on the subject of tennis -- during the time of Serena’s suspected juicing, she didn’t just win, she dominated and crushed her opponents.  That’s not to say that she didn’t work hard, hell, all athletes work hard, it’s just that the drugs make you bigger, better, stronger and faster.   Kinda like adding icing to the cake.

Now, in case you’re wondering how I know all of this, I’ll tell you.  For nearly 10 years I worked in numerous Gyms, Fitness Centers and Health Clubs as a Personal Trainer.  As you might suspect, I encountered all types of fitness buffs, many of which used some sort of performance enhancer/weight loss compound. Yes, I'm talking about drugs!  In fact, the entire fitness/sports/weight loss industry is replete with drug usage, with an estimated 60% to 70% of people having used some sort of drug at least a few times in their careers/lifetimes.  It’s also for these reasons that I believe every word, rumor, and accusation about steroids in Major League Baseball.

Back to Serena:  I remember when she bowed out of the Olympics. To me it was a very suspicious laden announcement.  Why at the last minute?  Hey, many athletes pay for, and/or administer their own private drug screens prior to competition to make sure that they'll test clean.  I think that she simply couldn’t pass a drug test and didn't want to suffer any humiliation, not to mention being banned from the sport.  No athlete just drops out of the almighty Olympics at the last minute over a sore knee.  Most strong competitors would’ve at least attempted to make the trip, especially with their first match still being days away.

                                 
You Be The Judge. Do You Think This Is A Naturally Produced Physique?

Hey, all I know is what I see based on my years of experience.  When I look at these pictures, I see a masculine body.  A body transformed by male sex hormones, aka Anabolic Steroids. You can even find pictures of her face close up at the time of the suspected use that show a squaring of the jaw line, a trait normally seen in males - not females. 

I'll tell ya - if most parents knew of just how many athletes used steroids, they might just consider making their kids choose their hero’s a bit more wisely.  So, do you think Serena ever juiced?  The world may never know with 100% certainty, but the world isn't stupid either.

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UT Vols Beat The Wisconsin Badgers!

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You Might Be A Floozy If:

You might be a floozy if,

Your best wardrobe outfit is a 2 size’s too small pair of Levi’s and a skimpy halter-top.

You think your own brother is hot in a sexual way.

You act like a hoe every time you go to a bar.

You just got ticketed by the Police and offered to “work it off.”

You sometimes refer to sex as work.

You have papers to prove that you are not infected.

You sometimes refer to sex as a date.

You are so self conscious that you eat your Bananas sideways.

Your guest ask for a cocktail, and you bring the your AZT, Valterx and Herpecin ointment.

You think that a night out on the town is prowling around a Truck-Stop til 2am.

You have broken up more than two marriages - (other than your own.)




You have ever used another womans picture (like this) and called it your own to draw attention to your myspace profile.  Or if you lie and have no other proof that this is really you. 


Your crowning achievement in life is having two guys to get into a fight over you.

You put out simply because you can.

You have to routinely spray RID Lice control spray in your underwear drawer.



You refer to your male friends as fans.

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Women's Pro Butt/Beach Volleyball - What's Not To Like?

What can I say? This, Women's Pro Beach Volleyball, is the sport I get the most scrutiny for watching.  And I wonder why?  Butt but seriously though, this is a very competitive sport.  It's just by chance that the uniforms that are the most comfortable, are also very sexy. Hey, if you like a rock-hard booty, then this is your sport. Now that we've cleared that, I shall give you a run-down of what's on the plate for today:

The first two pics, as their bikini bottoms imply, are Misty May (the finest volleyball ass of all) and her partner Kerri Walsh, who also has an ass tight enough to bounce a quarter a mile, and man it's so cute. Then I must give props to Brazil, or Brasil as they spell it.  If you ask me, from the looks of the butts on all of their players, it should be spelled  and/or pronounced BrASSil. 

And look at it like this: It is a very competitive sport, and unlike the Lingerie Bowl which is a manufactured fake sport, Women's Pro Beach Volleyball is a pure unadulterated sport that these ladies put their hearts into, all while putting their butts into our faces.   I can't complain about that.  I've also added a May/Walsh video just so you can see those cheeks jumping around all over the sand...   Oh yeah, you've got to watch the video to the end.  I truly believe that this is what Rodney King meant when he said, "why can't we all just get along?"   That man was a visionary.  

P.S.  And let's not forget Eva Longoria as MORE than an honorable mention below in the last pic.  Whew, that chick's tight!

                                                                               

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Bobby Petrino - What A Tool!

Bobby "Shyster" Petrino!


What a little weasel! Bobby Petrino has to be the biggest putz to ever enter the game of Football -- Pro or College bar NONE!

You know, if you’re good at reading people, you can see that shyster, two-bit cowardly look on his face -- it’s him - he can’t hide it! First in 2003, he sneaks down to Auburn, AL to have a secret meeting with the Athletic Director of Auburn to purportedly negotiate a possible Football coaching contract that would ultimately knife current coach Tommy Tuberville in the back. What a pussy!

Fast Forward to2006: Now, after a mere 4 seasons at Louisville, Bobby Petrino breaks more promises to kids whom he’d recruited to bolt like a madman for an NFL job with the Atlanta Falcons. Okay, to each his own I guess, but wait -- can it be? You bet!

Last night I was up uncharacteristically late watching TV, when a live press conference breaks in on ESPN. It’s none other than Bobby Petrino being announced as the new head Football coach of the Arkansas Razorbacks. But wait a minute - isn’t the NFL season still going??? Yep, but not for Bobby Petrino. He bolted early in the day on Tuesday -- then in a cowardly manner he calls the Falcons owner to give him the news, and then is announced as the new Arkansas head-coach with 3 regular season NFL games left.

He’s not even going finish the season with the Falcons!  What a punk! And just how is he going convince the parents of a 17 year old High School kid that he’s going to be around for the long-haul?  What a tool!

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The 2007 - 2008 College Football Bowl Schedule!

The 2007 - 2008 College Football Schedule:  Who Are Your Winners?

San Diego County Credit Union
Poinsettia Bowl

Final: Utah 35 vs. Navy 32
San Diego
Dec. 20 9 p.m. (ESPN HD)

R+L Carriers New Orleans Bowl
Memphis vs. Florida Atlantic
New Orleans
Dec. 21 8 p.m. (ESPN2 HD)

Papajohns.com Bowl
Southern Miss vs. Cincinnati
Birmingham, Ala.
Dec. 22 1 p.m. (ESPN2 HD)

New Mexico Bowl
Nevada vs. New Mexico
Albuquerque, N.M.
Dec. 22 4:30 p.m. (ESPN HD)

Pioneer Las Vegas Bowl
UCLA vs. BYU
Las Vegas
Dec. 22 8 p.m. (ESPN HD)

Sheraton Hawaii Bowl
Boise State vs. East Carolina
Honolulu
Dec. 23 8 p.m. (ESPN)

Motor City Bowl
Purdue vs. Central Michigan
Detroit
Dec. 26 7:30 p.m. (ESPN HD)

Pacific Life Holiday Bowl
Arizona State vs. Texas
San Diego
Dec. 27 8 p.m. (ESPN HD)

Texas Bowl
TCU vs. Houston
Houston
Dec. 28 8 p.m. (NFL Network)

Champs Sports Bowl
Boston College vs. Michigan State
Orlando, Fla.
Dec. 28 5 p.m. (ESPN HD)

Emerald Bowl
Maryland vs. Oregon State
San Francisco
Dec. 28 8:30 p.m. (ESPN HD)

Meineke Car Care Bowl
UConn vs. Wake Forest
Charlotte, N.C.
Dec. 29 1 p.m. (ESPN HD)

AutoZone Liberty Bowl
UCF vs. Mississippi State
Memphis, Tenn.
Dec. 29 4:30 p.m. (ESPN HD)

Valero Alamo Bowl
Penn State vs. Texas A&M
San Antonio
Dec. 29 8 p.m. (ESPN HD)

PetroSun Independence Bowl
Alabama vs. Colorado
Shreveport, La.
Dec. 30 8 p.m. (ESPN HD)

Bell Helicopter Armed Forces Bowl
California vs. Air Force
Fort Worth, Texas
Dec. 31 12:30 p.m. (ESPN)

Roady's Humanitarian Bowl
Georgia Tech vs. Fresno State
Boise, Idaho
Dec. 31 2 p.m. (ESPN2)

Sun Bowl
South Florida vs. Oregon
El Paso, Texas
Dec. 31 2 p.m. (CBS)

Gaylord Hotels Music City Bowl
Kentucky vs. Florida State
Nashville, Tenn.
Dec. 31 4 p.m. (ESPN HD)

Insight Bowl
Indiana vs. Oklahoma State
Tempe, Ariz.
Dec. 31 6 p.m. (NFL Network)

Chick-fil-A Bowl
Clemson vs Auburn
Atlanta
Dec. 31 7:30 p.m. (ESPN HD)

*Outback Bowl*
*Wisconsin Badgers vs. Tennessee Vols*
Tampa, Fla.
Jan. 1, 2008 11 a.m. (ESPN HD)


AT&T Cotton Bowl
Missouri vs. Arkansas
Dallas
Jan. 1, 2008 11:30 a.m. (FOX)


Gator Bowl
Texas Tech vs. Virginia
Jacksonville, Fla.
Jan. 1, 2008 1 p.m. (CBS)

Capital One

Michigan vs. Florida
Orlando, Fla.
Jan. 1, 2008 1 p.m. (ABC HD)


Rose Bowl
Illinois vs. USC
Pasadena, Cal.
Jan. 1, 2008 4:30 p.m. (ABC HD)

Allstate Sugar Bowl
Hawaii vs. Georgia
New Orleans
Jan. 1, 2008 8:30 p.m. (FOX)

Tostitos Fiesta Bowl

Oklahoma vs. West Virginia
Glendale, Ariz.
Jan. 2, 2008 8 p.m. (FOX)

FedEx Orange Bowl
Virginia Tech vs. Kansas
Miami
Jan. 3, 2008 8 p.m. (FOX)

International Bowl

Rutgers vs. Ball State
Toronto
Jan. 5, 2008 Noon (ESPN2 HD)

GMAC Bowl

Bowling Green vs. Tulsa
Mobile, Ala.
Jan. 6, 2008 8 p.m. (ESPN HD)


Allstate BCS Championship Game
LSU vs. Ohio State
New Orleans
Jan. 7, 2008 8 p.m. (FOX)

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